Lonely Greg
by RickyBallon
Summary: Greg Universe lives an easy going life. Yet, when things seem to be going bad he discovers an unexpected friend from the Crystal Gems. *Some suggestive themes* One Shot (Greg Universe X Amethyst)


Greg groaned as he was roused from his hangover slumber. Empty beer cans clinked and clanged as he moved to sit up. When his eyes adjusted, he gazed on his worldly possessions conveniently collected in his van. Surrounding him were old records like his Zeppelin collection, somewhat clean extra white t-shirts hanging above him, a mattress with pillows, a beer hammock, and his trusty waffle iron. He checked his digital watch, but cursed himself remembering it somehow only displayed 12:00. He figured it must be morning from the light shinning through, and probably should start getting ready to open the car wash. The back doors the van swung open as he stumbled out, letting a few empty beer cans fall with him.

"Whoa!" he grunted covering his eyes from the light outside. The sun hovered just above the ocean's horizon bathing everything in a warm orange-red color.

"Ah crap," Greg moaned realizing that it was the setting sun and he'd napped the whole day away. He put his hands in his pockets and leaned against his van with a frown on his face. This had been the third day in a row, he seriously needed to get a normal sleep pattern or he'll never get any customers! Greg's stomach made a mighty growl that reminded him that he hadn't eaten all day. He felt around in his pockets for any change or even some candy he forgot to eat, only to find a bottle-cap and some pocket lint. He knew he couldn't withdraw any more cash at the bank since it would close his account. Crestfallen, he closed his van and walked toward the beach, hoping he could find some change in the sand.

Greg was just about to set foot on the edge of the beach when he got an idea. "I can go for some bits!" he smiled, licking his lips.

He rushed over to the Beach Citywalk Fries, now grateful that it was sundown and he could score some free fry bits when it started closing up. Greg stopped in front of the walk up window and saw the Fryman family cleaning up.

"Hey Fryman!" he shouted, knocking on the window. "You got any bits for left over?"

Fryman opened the window. "Sorry Greg," he said, with a sad look on his face. "Your boy came by earlier and I gave him everything that I had left over."

"Ah come on," Greg pleaded. "Can't you just quickly make a small fry order for me?"

"Greg, we're just about done cleaning up. Come back tomorrow." With that Fryman shut the window and crushed Greg's hopes of getting something to eat for free. Greg muttered under his breath how he should never have showed Steven that trick. The day had come when Greg Universe had finally hit rock bottom. He never once doubted his life choices before, but now he began to wonder if he could have done something different.

"Having a bad day, Greg?" called out a familiar voice from atop the Beach Citywalk Fries roof. Looking up, Greg saw the easygoing grin of the white-haired light purple-skinned member of the Crystal Gems.

"Oh, hey Amethyst." Greg gave a half hearted attempt to sound more cheerful than he really was.

The stout Crystal Gem guardian leaped off the edge of the roof she was placed on, landing with loud thud on her feet. She threw her hair back when too much of it got in her face, but somehow still covered her left eye. She had one hand behind her back and had a big smile on her face.

"What's that you got there?" Greg asked somewhat curious.

Amethyst suddenly produced a greasy bag of fry bits while chiming, "Ta-da!"

Greg's eyes widened as realized what she was holding. He could smell the tasty fry bits that were still pretty fresh! He was speechless, he pointed at the bag of bits and then pointed at himself wordlessly asking if she was giving it to him. Amethyst nodded and handed the bag over.

"Whoaaa!" Greg's eyes lit up as saw the bag had a really good amount of fry bits. He looked back at Amethyst. "How'd you get this?"

Amethyst laughed, "Pearl wants Steven to eat more healthy, so she freaked out and took it away when he came home with it!"

"And how'd _you_ get 'em?" Greg asked trying to hold back a laugh himself.

Amethyst gave a look of shock. "I wasn't about to let tasty bits go to waste!" She grinned. "I took 'em outta the trash."

Both of them were laughing at that last bit of information. Greg dug his hand in the bag and pulled out a handful of bits, eagerly munching on them. These were the best bits he'd ever tasted. Amethyst smiled and raised an eyebrow, "Hey, just because I gave them to you doesn't mean you can hog them all!"

Greg nodded and turned the bag's opening toward her as she happily reached in for some bits. They sat down on the edge of the beach sidewalk and enjoyed the greasy delight. Amethyst gave a mighty belch as she patted her stomach with satisfaction. "Ah, man that was good!" she exclaimed.

"Can't argue with that." Greg beamed. He never realized how much he and Amethyst had in common. He defiantly had a healthy respect for women that enjoyed their food. He wished he hung out more with her earlier, but was sort of afraid some crazy magic thing would happen.

"Boy, I thought I was going to have to go to bed hungry." Greg sighed with relief.

"Naw." Amethyst waved a hand. "Don't mention it. Besides, I can't let Steven's Dad starve. What would Rose think?"

Greg looked down at his sandals. He never quite understood why a magical beauty like Rose choose to give up her physical form to have his kid. He knew it was her decision, but he never felt like he let Rose know how much he cared about her or how much he'd give to keep her.

"I know this sounds obvious, but sometimes, I really miss her." Greg folded his arms letting his chin rest on them.

Amethyst looked a bit unsure how respond to Greg's sudden serious tone. She narrowed her eye a bit before smiling. "Rose was all about being awesome, she'd never hangout with anyone who wasn't awesome. That's why she bagged you!"

"I live in a van," Greg muttered.

Amethyst cringed trying to think of a way to save her previous comment. She eventually shrugged. "Well, at least you're cool to hangout with."

Greg couldn't tell if she was being sincere or if she was just trying to make him feel better. Whatever the case it did cheer him up somewhat.

"Hey, you wanna beer?" Greg said lifting his head back up.

Amethyst grinned placing her hands on her hips, she gave a laugh. "Can you even afford it?"

Greg stood up and started walking back to the car wash. "I've always got a spare one just in case!" The Crystal Gem followed Greg back to his van. After a few minuets of searching, Greg hopped out of the van with a warm beer and handed it to Amethyst. Not showing any problem with a warm beer, she cracked it open with a satisfied look on her face. Greg just sat on the edge of the back of his van.

"Hey, where's yours?" Amethyst asked taking a good gulp.

Greg laughed nervously. "Well, I miscounted and looks like there's only one. But go ahead and have it!" he assured her.

She took a small sip before offering it back to Greg. He waved his hand trying to politely decline. Amethyst rolled her eyes. "Just take it, I don't have _cooties_."

Greg gave a half hearted laugh and took the beer back. He started to think it might look a bit weird for a forty something year old to be hanging out with a girl that looked maybe half his age. The beer she handed to him was practically empty so he set it on the ground next to the van.

"Pearl must hate me." Greg sighed, thinking out loud.

Amethyst looked like she was trying to think of a nice way to spin his observation. After several seconds of her thinking, Greg came to the conclusion that is exactly how Pearl feels about him.

"Hate..." Amethyst finally said, "isn't the right word." She then tilted her head and thought for a moment. "Pearl is actually more jealous of you."

Greg was taken aback. Pearl, the graceful, talented, and powerful member of the Crystal Gems was jealous of a guy that lives in a van?!

"Jealous?" he repeated. "Why would she be jealous of me?"

Amethyst suddenly had a childishly devious look, like a kid that knew a secret that you didn't. She leaned in close to Greg, "You know, Pearl had a thing for Rose too."

Greg turned bright red thinking of Rose and Pearl in..._**that **_way.

"S...seriously?" he stammered.

Amethyst was laughing hysterically at Greg's reaction. He suddenly became self very conscious. "Wait I wasn't...thinking of...them in...I mean—"

"I read your thoughts, you had images of Pearl on Rose action!" she snickered.

"No! Aww come on, Gems shouldn't read other peoples thoughts!" he protested.

Amethyst shrugged. "We don't, but you basically just admitted to having dirty thoughts."

"Well that was mean of you..." Greg rolled his eyes and made a frown.

Amethyst hopped up and sat next to Greg. "I can be nice if I want." She nudged him in a teasing way.

"Yeah, you can I guess." Greg gave a weak smile, remembering she's the reason he wasn't starving at that moment.

Amethyst's hand suddenly appeared on Greg inner thigh. "I can be _extra_ nice if I want to," she cooed in his ear.

Greg nearly fell off the edge he was sitting on. He jumped up with his hands in the air looking really shocked.

"WHOA! Uh..." He stammered, "I'm not...well, you should...wait, what!?"

Amethyst stared up at Greg with no sign of any sort of expression that she did something wrong. She looked more confused that Greg recoiled from her advances.

"What's the problem?" She now looked sort of hurt that Greg reacted like that.

Greg cleared his throat and regained composure. "Listen, I'm...really flattered, but..." He searched for the right words. "You know, I already have Rose."

Amethyst narrowed her eyes trying to process what Greg just said to her. He couldn't believe she honestly didn't seem to know what he was talking about. She thought for several seconds, before Amethyst had a moment of clarification.

"Oh!" she yelled, making Greg jump. "That's right! You humans have that marriage thing."

She gave a laugh. "Gems live a long time, so we don't usually form attachments to just one partner. I forgot how you guys do things. My bad."

Greg gave a nervous laugh. "Heh, yeah ok. Glad we cleared that up." He sat back down relived that he didn't have to feel awkward.

"You still wanna do it?" she asked.

"Wha-No!" Greg shouted.

"Why not?" she scoffed, like he just refused a free meal.

Greg gave a flustered sigh. "It just...wouldn't be right."

Amethyst folded her arms and glared at him. "You saying I'm not good enough?"

"No! That's absolutely not what I'm saying! It's like this, I married Rose, right?"

"Uh-Huh." She nodded.

"So...that means I have to be fateful to her. Get it?"

The Crystal Gem stared at Greg for a moment waiting for another response. "That's it?" she smirked, raising an eyebrow.

"That's the _big_ part of it." he said hoping this got through to her.

Amethyst shook her head. "Rose wouldn't mind, believe me. All she wanted was for you and Steven to be happy and safe. And now that she's not here, that doesn't mean she expects you to be some kinda monk."

Greg didn't know how to respond. He loved Rose, but he did know her long enough to know she never seemed the jealous type. It felt weird even contemplating this sort of stuff. It's not like he never thought about it, he just never thought another woman would ever find him desirable. Another Crystal Gem no less!

"It's not like we're bound for life," Amethyst smiled. "This is just as friends. You know?"

"As friends?" Greg had forgotten all about those sorts of relationships. He was running out of reasons to turn her down.

"So...you mean, like..."

"Casual sex," Amethyst said without a hint of embarrassment. "I've been around longer than you think, and I've been with Gems and humans. I like it cuz it feels good and it's a fun way to pass the time!"

He wasn't sure if Amethyst was making a compelling argument or if he just was lonely for too long. Greg's mind was still undecided, but his body seemed to have already made up it's mind. He somehow knew he was going to go through with this in the back of his mind. It just was a question as to when he'd give in. He hadn't been with anyone since Rose, and being this tantalizingly close to having company made his heart race. Greg's conscious made one last effort to avert the inevitable.

"Amethyst, you could probably have any guy you want. You shouldn't be wasting time with...this." He gave a goofy grin as he gestured to himself.

Amethyst leaned in and gave a tender peck on his cheek. "It's my time to waste," she whispered, "and I'd like nothing more than to waste it with this guy right here."

She took Greg's hand and lead him into the van, shutting the doors behind them. He didn't resist, he just went with it.

* * *

Greg opened his eyes. Laying on his chest and snuggled up next to him was the powerful and carefree member of the Crystal Gems, Amethyst. She looked up and smiled, her white hair falling over one side of her face. He brushed back her hair reviling the rest of her, much to her delight. They both were under an army surplus blanket he got a long time ago. It was a little scratchy, but Amethyst didn't seemed to mind. Greg would close his eyes then open them wondering if this really just happened.

"I take it you had fun?" Amethyst grinned.

"Heh." Greg couldn't find the words, it was the best he'd ever experienced. Eventually he had to say something since Amethyst seemed to be waiting for an answer.

"I can't lie, that was...maybe the best I've ever had."

Amethyst gave a triumphant grin. "Yep, I'm the best partner anyone can ask for."

As arrogant as that sounded, Greg couldn't argue with what he'd just experienced. He shifted to his side to face her.

"So...how did you get so good at...you know?"

"Years of practice," she cooed seductively.

"How old are you guys exactly?"

"Meh, you lose track after awhile. Does it really matter?" She sounded somewhat annoyed he'd ask something like that. Amethyst's frown softened when she had a moment to think.

"Youth is pretty over rated. People should go after mature guys and girls; they usually know what they're doing."

"Huh, never thought of it that way," Greg admitted.

Amethyst sat up and her cloths appeared on her with a sparkly purple flash. "Well, better head back to the temple. It's been fun; we should hang out more often!"

"Oh, okay." Greg was a little sad to see her go, but he knew they had an important job to do, so he figured he should keep quite.

She hopped out of the van just when Greg thought of something to say.

"Hey!" he quickly yelled.

"Sup?"

"...Thanks again, for looking after Steven I mean." He couldn't help but feel like on the verge of tears.

"I know it's silly, but it's true. You Gems mean the world to him."

Amethyst gave an embarrassed smile. "Ooookay, sure." She disappeared into the night.

Greg smiled; she may have sounded unappreciated but he knew she understood what he meant. He figured she just wasn't used to getting complements like that. He closed the back doors and laid back down. He sometimes wondered if he could have stopped Rose from giving up her physical form, but he knew in his heart nothing would have stopped her from bring Steven into this world. At least their child was happy and destined for great things. He drifted off thinking he ought to visit Steven the next time he had some free time.

The End


End file.
